BAPIE

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Tomtom's Day in the City

It was still dark when the alarm annoyingly beeped me awake as the
moonlight rays that mingled with streetlights filtered through my
window. Dark like the day my moronic self decided to enter a playground
at the suggestion of a friend who wanted to go on the swings as if he
were still 9. Apparently our presence in the playground was so severe it
warranted a blaringly pink slip that demanded our presence in court just
to pay a twenty five dollar fine. It also resulted in my friend(who is 9
times 2)
getting patted down by an obese middle aged donut chomping
coffee guzzling member of New York's finest. I was lucky enough to be
exempt from the special treatment for the simple fact that I have a
vagina and a set of breasts that could feed all of Africa and maybe some
other starving islands because no female officer was present. What a
shock, I know.

This lovely morning I awoke myself before the crack of dawn to make
myself present for this joyus occasion that was my court date: January
22, 2008. So my breasts and I journeyed to the Federal district where I
wandered aimlessly (I happened to lose that pink slip of joy months ago)
until I found this wonderful friend of mine to wait for our day in
court. It just so happened we were an hour early in New York's lovely
morning winter weather and not allowed to enter the court house early,
us being common criminals and all.

I suppose we were the youngest convicts to grace that courtroom, being
that you only heard our voices and reasonating laughter through out the
courtroom. Those other ex cons, they have no sense of humor. My
wonderful friend was repremanded for putting his sneaker clad feet on
the benches. We had such graceful courtroom ettiquite. And so we
youthful, giggling spazatastic teenagers cracked jokes and fiddled with
our Christmas gifted gadgets until the judge entered. Why he decided to
grace us with our presence 3 hours later when he arrived before all of
us evil doers, I'll never know.

My good old pal got his name misprounced as he was called to the stand.
His horrific crime of being in a city park after dusk was declared and
the judge asked him his age. Upon answering the judge, he was dismissed and his charges would be cleared in six months. I was called next and my turn yielded the same results. Almost at least. I didn't leave my brand new sixty dollar headphones and PSP on the bench.

And so, with the excuse of having a court date, us responsible
youngsters, we played hooky. College students can do that cause they're
wasting their parent's hardearned money for that one essential day that
they should have been getting jiggy with the learning. We wandered from the Federal district into the lavish Chinatown and then the shopaholic's glory that is SoHo. We pranced about the store, sampling and gawking at the high end products on display. Choke on that Target.

We wandered until the purported snow storm of the century began and
ventured back to school. We sat in the cafeteria, wasting more time till
classes finished. And then I was informed that a handsome, talented
young actor had passed away in a SoHo apartment. I googled the topic for 5 minutes till I was bored and dismissed the statement as a rumor. And a half hour later, a slew of media coverage poured out on the topic, indulging celebrity obsessed, tabloid gobblers of the scant details of his suspicious sounding death.

Even my friend who usually dismisses the ongoings of the glitz covered happenings of Hollywood's young stars was researching the event. That's a shocker coming from a guy like him. We were sorely disappointed at the young actor's death since a trailer featuring his lastest film kept us excited for its release. And then I dropped the topic. Took a nap, went to the gym, while all of America's teenyboppers and celebrity obsessed cried their eyes out.

Those who are much more engaged in the life of a fallen pop starlet that
their own nation's next leader. Those who mourned and sobbed while I
shamelessly showered and slept soundly for the next day which would be
chock full of schooling. Why yes, it's tragic to lose such a gifted
member of the world so young, I shockingly choose to concern myself with my own dull life instead of wailing and telling everyone I know. Suprisingly, I find my own life that much more interesting.

-Tomtom

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